Can You Let Go Of Perfection, Perfectionism Is Not Perfection!
Have you ever felt totally overwhelmed? Maybe you are trying to hard to be perfect in everything you do. Is it time to learn how to stop being a perfectionist? There are so many external and internal expectations placed upon your shoulders every day. Many of these come from you, yourself.
Many are thrust on you from the moment you are born. They come from all directions parents, teachers, the state, church, peers all expect you to behave in specific ways and achieve certain things as per their opinions, desires or even as a surrogate for their own perceived lacks. There seems to be this lingering pressure to be 100% perfect, to strive for nothing less than perfection, in other words, perfectionism. Many of you seem to take this mantle on yourself with no hesitation. This can be called Neurotic perfectionism! All you really need to do to succeed is let go of perfection. Yes, I know how hard it is.
What Causes Perfectionism?
Where does perfectionism come from and why is overcoming perfectionism so difficult? Simple! You receive praise if you fulfill “their” expectations and you may be invalidated if you do not. You try to be the perfect X, Y, Z’s in order to fit in. But all the time you feel like failures because you can’t live up to the other people’s ideas of perfection. Even the old adage, “try your best” or some form of it can be debilitating. There are so many personal dangers of striving for perfection. It can cause great uncertainty which leads to anxiety, which in turn sends you into a state of fear. Fear is debilitating!
It is not just “they or them.” In turn, we act out what you have learned. As well, you judge others and want them to be perfect in accordance with your expectations of who they are. Failing to see, know and love them for their authentic self in just the same way that others have done to you. This stands in your way of having your own direct authentic experience of yourself, of others and of the divine. So how can you overcome this challenge? Simple, let go of perfection. First, however, we need to understand how to know if you’re a perfectionist before you can move on to how to get rid of perfectionism.
In Pain – Need A Healing?
Here are a few telltale signs that you may have a bit of a perfectionist personality.
- Judgmental… As a Perfectionist you find yourself judging everything and everybody in regards to tasks. You find it difficult to take any sort of pride in your work or that of others because you can always find fault. Regardless of how well the whole project is completed that one little issue may irk you to the nth degree.
- Total Achievement… As a perfectionist, you strive for 100% success at everything you do. Nothing less than that is acceptable and is considered to be a failure.
- Result Oriented… You may say that everyone is result focused. However, not everyone has a myopic vision and drive. As a perfectionist, you have an unrealistic drive to succeed. There is only the end of the process. There is no pleasure in the task itself. You do not derive any form of satisfaction from doing a task. Only the realization of your goal is fulfilling in any manner.
- Driven... Most people are attracted, pulled, to their goals with the intention of doing their best. As a perfectionist, you are driven, pushed, towards completion of a goal with no room for failure whatsoever.
- Defensive… As a perfectionist, you take great offense in critical analysis of anything you do. You would not see this as help in any way but just a putdown.
- Unhappy Personality… Fear of failure is high on the list of worries for a perfectionist. This causes issues with their self-esteem. Because as a perfectionist you live in a sad world of self-judgment this will cause you to be very unhappy.
- Self Abusive… As a perfectionist, you have very little flexibility in accepting setbacks of any kind. Failure can drive you to a state of anxiety, stress and even depression. You may have a tendency to sulk and wallow in your unhappy emotions when flounder at achieving 100% success.
- Panic Tendency… Perfectionists have a tendency to live in an ongoing state of fear. Fear of failure. Failure is a great unknown. It is an empty dark place. The prospect of failure can literally cause a sensation of panic.
- Immobilized… Not unlike fear as a perfectionist you may put off doing things, starting projects, because you are concerned about achieving your 100% standard. Procrastination is an unlikely habit for a perfectionist you may think. However, as a perfectionist, you are more comfortable not starting a project or goal if you feel that you cannot complete it successfully.
Learn How To Stop Being A Perfectionist And Managing Perfectionism
Perfectionism and anxiety go hand in hand. Everyone including you may share some of these tendencies with the perfectionist. No need to panic. There is perfectionism treatment available for your situation. The best thing you can do is relax. Find things that will help you let go. I highly recommend meditation as an ongoing practice to alleviate negative habits and emotions. Meditation brings closer to your true nature which is Spirit and Spirit has no perfection tendencies. I have a great guided meditation that you can do to help ground you and move you towards a more positive, happy state of being.
Free Guided Meditation
In this Podcast, Learn How To Stop Being A Perfectionist, you will learn:
- Why we experience perfectionism.
- Living with perfectionism.
- How to overcome it.
- How meditation helps.
Join us on this episode of Unlocking Your Truth, Learn How To Stop Being A Perfectionist and find out why perfection is not always the best path to enlightenment.
A Free Psychic Reading
Other Podcasts In This Meditation Series:
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Unlocking Your Truth is my weekly radio show where we discuss all things metaphysical like Learn How To Stop Being A Perfectionist! And much more! The show airs on CIVL 101.7 FM at 7-8PM (Pacific Time) every Tuesday evening or live-stream the show at CIVL.ca. During each of our Unlocking Your Truth episodes, we also answer email questions from our listeners (click here to submit a question) as well as occasionally do readings live on air for our call in guests. You can call in 604.504.7441 ext 4142 and ask anything you want. You can also join us on simultaneous Facebook Live broadcasts of Unlocking Your Truth with Dr. Lesley.